Monday, February 16, 2009

Day 16: The Art of Communication

"And the LORD God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." Genesis 2:18

God says that it is not good for man to be alone. But the way some women criticize their mates, the husbands may long for solitude. Be careful today not to criticize your mate, but look for ways to encourage him personally and publicly.

Speaking of communication, does your husband communicate with you? God has made you a companion and helper for your husband, and part of being "one flesh" with him is the privilege of sharing and discussing personal needs and concerns. Thank God for that wonderful gift. Thank your husband for communicating with you. If your spouse does not communicate as you wish, look for ways that he communicates that are normal for him—smiling at you, nodding his head, even a pleasant "grunt!"—and then thank him for letting you know that he cares. Perhaps he needs to be lovingly taught how to communicate. Be patient with him . . . and listen when he does speak.

How, I wonder, would we describe our communion with our husbands? Is it sweet? Consistent? Painful? Avoided? Non-existent? I love to communicate... in this definition of the word: to give or exchange information, signals, or messages by talking, gestures or by writing. My husband would tell I love it a little to much :0). There was a time that I very painfully communicated to my husband, painful on both sides... I very unsympathetically and selfishly communicated to my husband every chance I saw. It was dangerous for him to be alone with me for even a second because I was ready to enchange information that I had stored away for such a moment of release. Sad but so true. I did not consider him... at all... it was all about me. I also never even thought about his way of communication nor did I ever acknowledge his attempts to do so. The other definition that I have found to be much more encouraging is: the art of expressing ideas. The art? I would add... the art of expressing ideas, emotions and deep and sometimes very shallow thoughts :0). It is truly an art... especially when we consider the other person who is on the receiving end of the conversation. How artfully do we comminicate with our husbands? Do we just throw our ideas, emotions and thoughts at him? or do we artfully and beautifully adorn our ideas, emotions and thoughts in the grace of Christ our Lord? I pray that before we would approach our husbands we would dip our tongues in His spectacular colors of grace... love... humility... kindness... gentleness and in His wisdom, soaked with sincerity and deep compassion..

As wives, usually the bigger communicaters but not always, we really need to be sensitive to our husbands in this area. Comminication with our beloved should be a thoughtful action as well as an artful action. I can not tell you how many times I have simply thrown my thoughts at my husband causing so much havoc because I did not give it much thought as to how I should express them to him, God was not honored and nor was my husband. I need to examine myself, my heart, my intentions and the time and place and then artfully soak each of my thoughts in Christ before I speak... express... exchange. How also I wonder in the ultimate meaning of marriage would I comminicate my thoughts with my Saviour Jesus Christ as I am to display the church in the covenant between Christ and the church. I know my husband is not perfect as Christ is perfect but in the biblical perspective which is what matters... how would I? Isn't that how I should then communicate with my husband who is to represent Christ, even if he is not seeking that representation, we are to hold to that model as the wives.

Examine yourself... your husband... and then express... or not.

So sorry if I made little to no sporatic sense... the culprit of time or lack there of.

JOYfully in Him,

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